Chapter 9  Overcoming Fear

Tess Swiestowski, Reading: 20 March 2012

Dearest Toby,
 
Jan and I wish you a very happy and enjoyable life, full of fun and joy, and to always turn to your supportive circle to help you whenever you meet challenges in life.

When I was a little girl, my mother told me about the many challenging situations she faced and how she overcame her fears.

• One that stood out the most for me was how she managed to walk alone through a forest in Russia late at night hoping that she wouldn’t get lost and attract the wolves and bears living there.
• Then when she was in Kenya, Africa, for six years, she and her friend shared a small mud hut. She told me how hard it was to sleep when lions prowled around their village, hoping they wouldn’t jump up onto their straw roofs and maybe find a way into their huts.

Over the years, I have learnt a lot about fear and the many ways to stay calm when I’m challenged, so that I can think clearly and so decide the best course of action.

Last week, I was glad to help my little granddaughter, Isis, who is four years old and very frightened of our big black dog, Smithy, who is much bigger and stronger than she is.

If he came close to her and she wanted to cry but tried not to, her whole body trembled as she tried to work out what to do, hoping someone will rescue her. So I taught her to blow her breath out as soon as she started to feel uncomfortable. She learnt this very quickly and soon she was blowing out her breath just as if she was blowing out a candle every time she felt threatened, and soon she was able to continue colouring her beautiful drawings, and then felt happy to run and play, no longer wondering where Smithy was and whether he might come over to her. Smithy was able to feel calm and secure too, as he felt everyone around him was calm and relaxed, so he just went to sleep.

So dearest Toby, know how very much you are loved by your wonderful parents, family and friends; how powerful you are; and to never give your power away. One of my biggest lessons has been that as soon as we believe our fears, we start to give our power away.

Your dearest friend,
 
Tess Swiestowski